What does it mean?

Is life trying to tell you something when you set your iPod on shuffle mode, and among hundreds of songs, two different versions of "Send In The Clowns" play back to back?

Don't you love a farce
My fault i fear
I thought that you want what I want
Sorry my dear

Isn't it rich
Isn't it queer
Losing my timing this late in my career

But where are the clowns
Quick send in the clowns
Don't bother, they're here

A movie and a song

Have you ever experienced a moment whereby you were moved to tears by a movie or a song? For me, it was the movie Beaches. In the last scene of the show, Bette Midler's character sings Wind Beneath My Wings with just an overhead spotlight shining on her, and Barbara Hershey's character's daughter looking by the stage side. That scene is so moving it makes me cry (yes I admit, I cry sometimes) everytime I watch it and I never remember crying over a movie before that (not even when ET has to go home) and not since.

Why am I writing this? I've just listened to that song again and for some reason, I felt like crying but this time not because it reminded me of the scene from the show but somehow I just feel sad. Dunno why. Hmm...I think I need to see a shrink soon.

In the meantime, have you recently said thank you to the wind beneath your wings?

Mindless ramblings from a 30s chinese guy

Here I am, 12666 days old (or 34 years, 256 days old today-thanks to the marvels of Excel), and i don't have an idea what to write...talk about your major writer's block...not that i'm professing myself to be a writer and not that this blog is anything like Bridget's all ready for a major hollywood production.

Oh well, time for a cup of hot milo and stare at the dark ceiling, counting sheep which actually i know won't work but it'll keep my mind off the fact that I'm staring at the dark ceiling counting sheep which won't work but.....(u get the idea)

Sugar and Sago Pudding

A spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down...
A bowl of "Mango and Pomelo with Sago Cream" lifts my work-related frown

Another deadline for another client

Time and time again I've said that I don't care
That I'm immune to gloom, that I'm hard through and through
But every time it matters all my words desert me
So anyone can hurt me - and they do

Call in three months time and I'll be fine I know
Well maybe not that fine, but I'll survive anyhow
I won't recall the names and places of this sad occasion
But that's no consolation - here and now


...from Another Suitcase In Another Hall, Evita

(i've got no title for this)

There are times when you feel like you wanna run up the hilltop, with your arms outstretched, singing your heart out with all the joy in the world just like Julie Andrews did in the opening scene of The Sound of Music . . . I don't feel like that right now.

Instead...
I wanna throw up yet there's nothing wrong with me
I wanna jump out the window but the window can't be opened
I feel trapped between the devil and the deep blue sea
I feel like the victim in Saw/SawII (if you've seen that movie)
I feel like singing yet no voice can come out
...that nagging feeling that everything is not right in the world and everyone is out to get you...I feel that right now....


The hills are alive with the sound of music....yet all I can see in front of me are mountains of work and stress which I can do without yet I can't avoid....

An afterthought

Instead of "Don't judge a book by its cover", perhaps it should be "A book is only as good as how much other gain from reading it"? :P

Revelation of an old man

Well, in the spirit of Roosters and Dogs (and procrastination of course), how was your chinese new year celebration? Did you say "It was another just like an orgy of food, questions on your marital status and forced pleasantries"? Well, the good news is that there's 11 more months till the next one. How much leftover cookies do you have to finish till then?

I've got a revelation recently, heck I don't think it's a revelation but rather something that struck me in the head like the stench from a case of rotten papayas. It finally dawned on me that our lives are going to be judged by what it meant to other people. What I mean is, if you think of it, the people who's remembered most is generally the people who have affected others the most in their lives, right? If that's the case, then does it mean that we are brought into this world not to live our lives for ourselves but to live for others? And if that is true, how am I doing at this test? And how are u doing? Wouldn't it be just sensible to reach out and touch others than to go on telling the world about how good your life is or how well you're living? Isn't that goodness meant to be shared else it doesn't add up to much? I mean, what I do with my life in my own time is between me and the Creator....but what I do that affects others will be how I'll be remembered in this lifetime, correct?

Do you even understand a word in the paragraph above? Upon re-reading it, I am not quite sure what I'm trying to write or say :P But that's me nowadays, babbling like an old man on steroids with no comprehension of what I'm saying. Hmm...